Annapolis Maryland photographer|Country Music Memories

Weird title? Perhaps.  I was cleaning yesterday and listening to music on the CMT channel and I was just reminiscing. Country Music and I go back as far as my first memories. I grew up with it, and not just by listening to it occasionally, it was on ALL the time.  Of course, I went through other music as well and was a huge New Kids on the Block fan from the age of 5-8 and then I got into boy bands and classic rock into my teens. Country music will always hold the number 1 spot though, there’s just this feeling I get when I listen to it. A feeling so deep in my gut and soul that just means everything.

Everyone has this one thing, this something that brings a lifetime of memories and feeling from the depths. No matter how hard you try to suppress them and no matter how long they’ve been hidden, they just come back to the surface in a split second. Mine is country and I believe it always will be. When I was little and before I was born, my parents sang in a band with their friends. It was  called first Kelly and the Midnight Special and then Glenn and the Country Drifters and then changed to Ambush. When I was about 4 or 5, they let me sing on stage with them and I sang songs by Kentucky Headhunters and Marty Stuart. Now, you may not even know who those are, so quick, go look them up. You probably still don’t know, but that’s ok!  I was a ham for the attention, really. I loved it and have several home videos of me showing off and the rare appearance of me being a little shy (only on stage) while singing.

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When we went to my grandparents house, county music was blasting from the speakers of my Grandpa’s garage. There was never a time where it wasn’t on. I can still see us running around while Garth brooks rang through the yard through those old speakers. The smell of the bonfires, the laughs we all shared while picking on my grandma, or tasting the smores we were adament on making every time we were there. My Grandparents, sadly, sold that house a few years back and I was more sad than I cared to admit. To me- that place was more home than anywhere else. It was an old house with creeky steps, a scary attic, and a dining room that held ALL of us during Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. It was the cold front porch where my grandma stored the pies in the winter during those dinners and where we played cards in the summer mornings.  It was where my Grandma cornered my-then-boyfriend (and now husband) and asked him when he was going to propose. It had the yard and the garage that catered to our weekend events and those bonfires where we roasted the marshmallows (sometimes until they were too burnt) for the smores we ate. It was where the clothes hung on the lines, where Grandpa stored his hot rods, where the old swing set was, and most importantly-where 75% of my happiest of memories and some of the scarier ones are.

Thinking about it makes me cry so easily. Not just because I miss being there, but because I am so happy that I have those and can remember them so fondly. Now that my Grandma is gone, the memories mean even more but I hope to someday be able to share those memories with the family I am creating. I want my children to feel so happy that they could burst when they think about the times we have, wherever we are. It doesn’t have to be a house with creeky stairs or a big dining room, or a place where we can have bonfires- we can create many memories wherever we are.  I hope that when they are older and look back on their younger days, they can remember the details and the laughs, the people and the place, but most importantly- I hope they can remember how amazing they feel when thinking of them. I hope they create their own Country music memories- even if it’s not country at all.

 

Brittany and Fred’s Maternity session|Annapolis Maryland photographer

 southern maryland maternity session:

I had the honor of photographing a maternity session for a fellow photographer in the Southern Maryland area the other day. She is expecting a little boy and she and her husband Fred are so excited to meet this little guy. I know that if I am excited to meet him, I can only imagine what they must be feeling. It’s the most anxious time in anyone’s life and the thrill is just at the top of the scale.

Little Charlie is going to be a very loved and lucky little guy. Your parents are pretty darn great, little man. You are going to have a wonderful life!

  beach maternity

beach maternity

beach maternity

couple on the beach sitting

sunset maternity portraits

Brittany is just stunning and glowing and everything a mama to be could be. I adore this light, too.

sunset maternity portraits

couple maternity on the beach

couple maternity on the beach

cropped maternity belly

Fred was trying to get him to kick and punch. The little guy sure was moving around in there!

couple maternity laughing on beach

This is too cute for words….so I just won’t say anymore :)

couple maternity on the beach

couple maternity with long grass

croped maternity black and white

couple maternity with long grass

couple laughing-maternity

Laughing is one of my favorite things and I am so glad I was able to capture this for Charlie to see of his mom. She is beautiful.

couple kissing maternity

take these two (above and below) guys, and get them in canvas, because they’re awesome. ok? ok!

couple maternity with long grass and gorgeous light

Ahhhhh this light and this….everything. I just looooove the one above, so much!

Annapolis Maryland photographer|Motherhood Monday

There are times when I just can’t wait to get out of bed in the morning. I hear Luke talking to himself in his room and I know that he is happy, which makes me happy. When I walk in and he can’t roll over fast enough to say “HI!” in a high pitched, excited, melt-your-heart kind of way.

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It wasn’t always like that though- not in the beginning. Once Luke was finally here, I was relieved. Despite the traumatic birth experience we all endured and the horrible 72 hour hospital stay on top of the day I was there being induced….it was long and exhausting but we were both overjoyed he was finally here. A few weeks later, once my husband went back to work and I was easing back into work- I had to figure out how to manage a house, 3 animals, my business and a newborn. To say it was difficult would be an understatement. It took many trial and error periods, a few swift kicks in the pants (by no one other than myself), a lot of tears, and a lot of coming to realizations I was trying not to come to- to figure it all out. Surely it didn’t and wouldn’t happen overnight, but I was definitely naive to think it would. I went through many ups and downs, but to be honest and fair- it was mostly downs. I felt like a terrible mother, a terrible business person, a terrible pet owner, and a terrible wife. To be real for a second-and this may be hard to hear for those who didn’t experience this- I had many thoughts of running away. It didn’t take long to realize that I was most likely suffering from Post Partum Depression. When I saw my doctor and told her about this all while sobbing and barely being able to get my words out, she very openly and warmly hugged me and told me it was going to be okay, that I was a great mother, and that Luke was doing so well!  It makes me teary-eyed just thinking about how sweet and amazing she had been and how much she had been there for me through the ups and downs of the birth experience in itself. At that moment, she wasn’t just my doctor, she was someone I could confide in and not just because I had to in order to do something(!) about it. I chose not to medicate myself for it, but that is likely due to my being stubborn, but I did talk about it. To my parents, to myself, to my husband, to my friends…..I talked about it with strangers on forums….anyone who would listen. You wouldn’t believe the number of people who responded back to posts I made about it saying they went through it too. I wasn’t alone! It felt good to get it out and to meet others who could empathize with you and give advice on what worked for them.  After I allowed nature to take its course, and when Luke was about 5-6 months old, I finally started feeling like myself again. It was a long road- and just like anything in life, there are still ups and downs. Parenthood is not easy, but it sure is rewarding and 100% the greatest thing I will ever do my life. I know that there are so many that go through what I did, and there are some much worse- I urge you that if you fall into either of those- talk to someone- your doctor, a friend, a forum, a therapist- anything that will help you in any form. Its OK to talk about- its OK to go through it….it’s not your fault and there’s nothing you did wrong. The best thing you can do is to just talk about it and whatever solution works best for you (therapy, medicine, massage oils, etc)- do it. It doesn’t have to be permanent, but it does have to be your choice. Do it for you, but more importantly- your family. They need you and want to see you happy, and you’ll want to be the best you can be to feel happy for yourself, too!

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